THE SEARCH FOR MR. ADEQUATE
Part 55

By Susan Silver

My new adventure buddy, LL, and I decided to spend Saturday at the New York Times Travel Show. Why? First of all, we both love travel, and second of all, taking the advice of my Dear Readers, I am trying to go to places that men might be wandering through. And boat shows don’t appeal to me.

Now, as I’ve told you guys repeatedly, it’s become apparent to me that I really just have to do the things I enjoy and the men part ... well, it ain’t happening. Whether it’s a numbers thing as I believe, or I’m too picky, which I am, or ... whatever, it just ain’t. (She said ungrammatically for emphasis.)

But we went to the Javits Center bright and early. Well at 11 a.m., which for me is early. And propelled as I am by caffeine these days, I was excited about the whole day. Then I saw hundreds of scruffy weird young people in a line. Oh oh. I called LL’s cell phone and almost told her to turn the cab around, but I was informed that this line was for the Comic Book Convention groupies. Whew!

The Travel Show, which consisted of a ton of booths of places I have no interest in going to, was at first glance a disappointment. But here is why you have to have positive thinking friends. LL is a low pressure kind of gal. The kind that it’s good to be around. And though we were disappointed with the booths and frankly the clientele ... that old picky thing again ... we soldiered on determined to make the best of it. Which is a new attitude for me.

(Let’s face it. Folks with private planes who go to Five Star destinations are not patrolling the Javits Center.)

There were however some seminars which were extremely interesting and at one of these we encountered ... ta da: “Almost The One!!” Just to remind you that the Adequacy Scale’s top is “The One.” I am making an exception for this guy and creating a new category.

Without naming names, I will give you the story. This Author, who has a very eclectic and diverse background, had become a top seller with a series of extraordinarily interesting bio’s. He was not handsome but bald and rather “cute” with a delicious accent which always helps. He was as witty and charming and amusing as we could ever want in a guy. And he appeared to be single.

At this point both LL and I were thinking the same thought. How someone can become devastatingly attractive if they are smart and have a good personality. And we both wanted him!

Then he dropped the ‘P bomb.’ He was talking about where he lives now, in kind of a rural and rustic place which didn’t appeal to us, by the way. But we would have roughed it. Then he mentioned his “partner.” Sigh. Now it probably meant same sex, but either way ... he is, of course, not available.

But what have we learned, boys and girls? That looks and good hair are not in the top two requirements anymore.  Yes ... we actually were bolstered by this knowledge. Because it provides us with a wider base of prospects. And he did tell me to call him when I’m in the area and we are going up there just to do it!

Then we continued eating stuff we didn’t need, and gathering brochures from places we had no intention on going and we had fun. I made some contacts for future travel writing, who knows. We laughed and got some walking exercise and by five o’clock, it had been a good time all around.

Men-0.

Don’t Give Up

In Sunday’s Wedding Section of the NY Times, there was a wonderful article about a couple who wed at 72 and 80. The fact that she was the supremely accomplished former Governor of Vermont probably made it more interesting. But I just loved the story and it gives one hope.

I think I’ve said before that Margaret Mead said there should be three marriages in one’s life. The young one, the middle aged, and the elderly.

I actually thought at one time that my ex who was the perfect ‘young marriage’ guy would have also been the perfect ‘elderly.’ It’s just those middle years that wouldn’t work. The years where I want to go and do things and travel and have adventures and he just wanted to stay home.

Now he has remarried so unless something dire happens we won’t be together at the end anyway.

I guess I might find someone else when I am eighty as we both totter around the Home ... but it’s just these eons in between that are problematic.

Then today on the bus I saw the opposite end of the romantic journey.

A really geeky young teen guy (don’t ask what qualifies him for that description, just trust me you know it when you see it) was hitting on a girl his age. She was not particularly cool either, but he still had an uphill struggle.

He started by asking her if she knew “anyone” who liked Billy Joel. She said “no.”  

He then said, “I know, because I have two tickets to the concert and no one to go with.”

She then double whammied him with “Well my parents like him. You could take one of them.”

To which he replied, “But I only have one extra ticket.”

Then, in an awkward attempt to climb out of the toilet he dialed his cell phone and had a loud conversation with someone about leaving him the key to his house. He hung up and semi suavely turned and said to her,” That was my Dad’s Driver. He’s a really cool guy. A really cool guy.”

To which she said nothing as she had on her headphones and was listening to music.

At this point I changed seats because my heart was hurting for him. Oh humiliations of youthful romance. Oh, the joys of elderly romance. On the boredom of in between!

I’m going to D.C. this weekend for a conference of about 3,000 people, primarily men I think, of like persuasion in a socio/political realm. If I don’t come away with at least one date ... well ... pray for me.