THE SEARCH FOR MR. ADEQUATE
Part 72

By Susan Silver

The headline is this:  I had the greatest time of my life!  How’s that? As vacations go…it was THE ONE!!

Every summer for the past six years I have gone to the Aspen Institute for their seminar programming.  And by now I’ve accumulated a lot of friends there.  People who come in from other places, and people who live there year round.

In fact, I was amazed to realize that I probably have more friends there than I do in either LA or New York.  It seems strange, but my oldest single girlfriends in LA come to New York infrequently, and so I don’t see them more than once a year. And I only see Deb three or four times when she lands here on her way to some cruise …and only for a few days at a time. 

In New York, I have Stan and LL, my new close girlfriend, two close couples whom I visit in the Hamptons and Palm Beach and lots of nice acquaintances.  But for running around everyday friends…there were about 15 people in Aspen I could call on.

Thus, unlike my usual life, I was out every day for at least one or two activities. And of the 22 nights…I was home only 2!  What? Me, the hermit who rarely gets out of bed, running an active social life and flying around every minute? Yes!  And boy as the saying goes…”are my arms tired!”

The first day I got in, I checked in to my favorite place, The Aspen Square, which is a condo/hotel right smack in the middle of town.  I rent a huge studio which has a full kitchen, living room area and pull down bed.  There is also a dressing room and large bath.  Each year I stay in another condo as it is fun to see the different decors and my favorite one was once George Hamilton’s….it wasn’t available this time. (By the way, I saw him sitting outside at a restaurant with a cute little kid on his lap and a pretty dark haired woman by his side. He does not look like a piece of leather as he does on TV sometimes.)

Note: I will be dropping names throughout this entire report. Let’s think of it as ‘Aspen Social Diary.’

I know the staff at the place by now and they know me…and it is a friendly vibe so you feel at home and very comfortable and can hang out in the lobby and use the Internet and see who is coming and going.

I shopped at the grocery store for my staples and unpacked, took a long bath and crashed.

The next morning, one of my friends, who actually was responsible for my first going there, took me to breakfast at Little Nell.  It’s one of the nicer hotels and we sat out on the patio and ran into someone she knows from Las Vegas.  This is what’s great about Aspen. Everyone is out and about early in the morning…even me…and you can stumble into any place and see five people you know and they then know you are in town and start making plans.

I had dinner that night with some girlfriends from D.C. I had met at the seminar last year. They were involved with the Health Seminar.  FYI, the Ideas Festival is a three or six day program with outstanding speakers from all over the world, exploring different topics of interest.  About 450 people attend and there are large plenary forums and then smaller, more intimate “tutorials” you attend to really interact with the speakers. 

I went on the Democracy, Media, and Culture tracks.  Some of the themes were Terrorism, Middle East, New Media vs. Old Media and Evangelicals in America.  The following three days dealt with Health, Environment, Education. 

I did only the first program but snuck in to some of the second as there were certain topics I cared about such as Darfur, and my old boss Norman Lear (I wrote the first Maude) was on a media panel with Ben Bradlee.   Norman was sweet enough to introduce me and give me a plug for my old TV writing days and that made me lots of points amongst the super achievers who attend these programs.  He is a great guy and Ben, though in his eighties, is darned attractive.  Too bad his wife, Sally Quinn, was at his side constantly and if truth be told, kept interrupting the panel which my new best friend, the adorable journalist Margaret Carlson, was running just fine, thank you!

Yes, Dear Readers, Ben Bradlee could have been The One for me, twenty years ago.

Among the speakers was Alan Greenspan, who was amazing and clear and yes…even sexy! I know it sounds strange, but several of my girlfriends found him so. Not just me! He was dressed well and commanded the stage and was very funny.  His wife Andrea Mitchell was cute too when she introduced him and said it took him three times to propose before she understood what he was saying.

Others who were really excellent: Judge Stephen Breyer of the Supreme Court…(remind me to tell you what he said when I went up to talk to him…that is the BEST part about this program…the ability to go up to anyone and talk with them),  Brian Greene who is a “rock-star” physicist seen on PBS Nova and makes all that stuff actually understandable, my other new best friend Lord John Alderdice, who was one of the leaders of Ireland who made the peace with Sein Fein and is psychoanalyst as well as a politician, a very warm and engaging preacher named TD Jakes who is in D.C. and has preached to a million people in Africa…and I could go on and on…and heck I will, this week and next. Yes I am high on life and it’s about time, ain’t it?

So you are in programs all day and have a lunch speaker who is usually someone very big like Colin Powell or Ambassador Danny Ayalon from Israel and then there are cocktail parties in which you can mingle and late night programs at a venue in town. Lots of talk, lots of stimulation, lots of fun. Lots of networking.  And, kids, you know I am good at that.  But only when it has nothing to do with my getting a date!

I have no problem going up to oh, say a Supreme Court Judge like  Breyer…(oh yeah, what I told him was that I was so relieved to hear that he and hopefully the others ARE aware of us, ‘the little people’ and what we think and want.  They are not up in some Ivory Tower, unreachable, unresponsive.  He replied that that is one of the reasons he comes to these kind of forums, to let people know that he listens and is human. Whew! Now about that Florida election decision…never mind.)

But what I was going to confess is, that yes…I can go up to anyone from him to a Lord Alderdice and have no problem becoming “new best friends” but when it comes to a single guy…I seem not to be connecting as well.

Well, let’s be honest I didn’t see one single guy who I wanted to connect with for dating purposes.

Okay, okay, I lied. Out of the 450 and three days, I did see one guy…at a screening for a fabulous movie on the singer/poet Leonard Cohen.  I was meeting one of my girlfriends from New York who is so busy being a mother and executive and wife that I rarely see her, and I got into the line in front of a really attractive cowboy looking guy with horn rim glasses. Tall, dark and gorgeous.  Did I say hello or make him my new best friend? Did I even smile and give him an opportunity to make a move…NOOOOOOOO.  

That gave me pause later that evening…and it is something I have not been able to forget.  Is it that I am not really interested in finding someone to date, fall in love with and marry? Am I just interested in world class minds and conversation only?  Or am I not giving guys who are not drop dead gorgeous a chance by talking with them and finding out they might be interesting? ( I say this as I made great contact with some not drop dead gorgeous/ world class minds who are now my new best friends but guys I am not interested in dating and who are not available anyway.) Or all of the above? 

Hmmm…to be continued next week with good dish, some show biz people are jerks (no big surprise), a new precious boy who gives good kisses and other insights about me, life in Aspen and the joys of life which we must take advantage of! http://mradequate.blogspot.com.

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