THE SEARCH FOR MR. ADEQUATE
11/10/06

By Susan Silver

I usually get emails in response to the columns and happily, they are, with just one exception, always nice. (The lone nasty one was when I kvetched about the overdone Halloween décor on the neighbor’s town house which made it look like Coney Island.  The person writing, no name of course, said ‘no wonder I couldn’t find anyone.’ I cried for … no time at all.) 

This time, in reference to the lousy treatment I got at Bella Boo, oh I mean Blu (last week’s column) I got three times the usual amount! Boy, did that strike a chord with you DR’s.

A few from guys were simply sympathetic and that’s so sweet of you. And two different women told me that they had the exact same treatment … at the exact same place!  So, do we detect a pattern here?

And other women, unsolicited, decided to call or email the place and let them have it!  Really!  How cool is that?!  It’s nice to know you Dear Readers have my back! Of course I probably will need protection, as in bodyguards, but what the heck.

Seriously, I have to tell you how neat it is to hear that the stuff I tell you is something you can either identify with or empathize with.  It makes me feel less alone, which I guess is why one writes, isn’t it?  To connect.  It sure ain’t the money … (subtle hint to Editor.)

A few restaurateurs also told me I should not have left any tip at all, as that would get their attention.  But I felt kind of sorry for the Waiter as the mean guy Manager was calling the shots.

But enough about you … as I often have to say to Stan when we are talking … now back to me! (me me!)

Busy busy busy

I was really busy this week. Stan, who lives in the ‘world of fashion’ as we know, got me invited to the Tom Ford do for his new fragrance, Black Orchid.  I was running late so rushed to get ready and was out the door for the 6 o’clock invite when I checked it and saw I either had dyslexia or was getting Alzheimers … as it was 9 not 6!

So I sat at home for three lonnnnnggg hours, fully clothed in my outfit watching TV and trying not to nod off.  The party was at the observation floor of Rockefeller Center which was quite a treat.  The view of our Dear City at night is spectacular.

I broke my rule which is NEVER to wear black to a party in NY as everyone else is wearing it, and you’ll never stand out (which I didn’t and I will never do it again!)  And since the decor, to honor the fragrance was all black also, I doubt that anyone even saw me except for a pair of silver dangling earrings which floated around the room.

The usual model/fashionistas/press/ wait staff in black were talking only to each other. I left early and didn’t see Tom, but the fragrance we got in the goody bag is smashing.  It has all sorts of complex notes of yummy stuff which make it smell differently on different parts of the body it seems. It is layered and lush and the bottle is sexy. I was smelling my arm all night as I slept and had dreams … well … never mind.

Then I went to a lovely black tie charity with a friend who had taken a table.  I was wearing my favorite pumpkin (no not for Halloween) colored chiffon and as I was leaving this time, I looked down and saw a huge spot on my left boob!  I had obviously gotten some makeup thingee on it and it didn’t wash off!  Two minutes to being picked up and since I was determined to wear this outfit, I switched the top from front to back and put the shawl part over it.

This mishap should have been a sign … bad evening coming.  Now the cause is wonderful, I love getting dressed up, the food was good etc. etc. and I saw a lot of people I knew. But kids, something happened that’s not happened tome before.  I went into a funk.  It had something to do with wanting to be with someone and not just a guest of someone else.  There were actually several single women at the table, so I shouldn’t have focused on this at all, but I did.

My friend, the Widow LL, and I discussed this the next day and she said she understood. Of course, when you’ve been recently widowed, it is a more understandable feeling.  With me, I really don’t know what hit me, because I have been divorced a very lonnnnngggg time and should be used to it having been with LOML for so long who didn’t even live here. 

I looked around the room and frankly there was not one man among at least 400 who interested me.  That is depressing. And kind of scary!  And, to be brutally honest, there were quite a few women who were very attractive with husbands that … how can I put this … looked like trolls! I’m sorry. I meant to say, that weren’t my type, but obviously they loved them.  Didn’t they? The ones with all the major jewelry? I’m sure they did.  She said sarcastically.

But perhaps I am too cynical. My friend in Santa Barbara has said that living in NY can make one cynical. I don’t think I am … I’m just observant!!

Fortunately, I snap back quickly.  The next day I had a business lunch with the Editor/Publisher of Shattered, the new women’s mag.  And we ran into a ton of interesting people at Michael’s … where else?  And yes we table hopped on the way out and it was fun like a party.

But don’t you think that cell phones shouldn’t be ringing at a restaurant? Just asking … that means you … the loud guy seated behind me who talked all through lunch. His lunch partner didn’t seem to mind, but then again, I did! I am too picky.

I saw a screening of the movie about the night of Bobby Kennedy’s death, ‘Bobby.’ It was a really interesting ‘time travel’ which captured the life we led then, the dreams we had and sadly, many of the same problems we are going through today.  I can’t really judge it as a film, because it touched a chord in me of so much more.  Or perhaps that means it was a great success artistically.  Huge star studded cast. See for yourself.

LL and I went to see the revival of ‘Company’, one of the greatest musicals ever, in my opinion.  You know I love Stephen Sondheim and this piece about the perennial bachelor and wanting to be alone/together … well … let’s just say Stan had an anxiety attack when he went with yet another new date.

I cried at the finale … ’Being Alive’...one of the greatest songs ever written. The lead, playing Bobby (yes, another Bobby) was really interesting. At first we thought he was rather ordinary, though very real … almost like a guy who wandered off the street. By the last song, he was thrilling!

The new staging with the performers also playing the instruments is very novel, though in the beginning I wanted them to stop roaming the stage.

So to sum it up … it’s important to have friends, to go out and have fun, and yes, it would be greater to have a partner. Thus, the Search continues.

This is that Jerky looking manager you've been speaking so highly about.

I have to say that after a stressful day at work your article looked pretty amusing to me, especially when you mentioned that a couple of glasses of wine would have been adequate, "come on" they would have cost me more than you spent for dinner.

anyway I could be very polemic about but I would simply tell you that, if you decide to have a pleasant conversant ion with a friend you don't see from long time you might want to pick a less busy restaurant were to share a couple of salads and two sodas, and about the attitude, well sometimes having a date can help!

by the way the next week was busier than ever, who knows, they say that bad rewies are good publicity, thanks again and many pleasant dinners!

Marco

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