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 Celebrating lives
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Looking north from Park Avenue and 72nd Street. 10:30 PM. Photo: JH. |
April 2, 2009. Grey and promising rain yesterday in New York. Promise delivered.
This is the 109th anniversary of the birth of my father who departed this world in 1974. The son of Irish immigrants who came to America in the late 1880s, he was born in a house in Brooklyn on a street that ran along the East River (where he swam as a kid). That street (and all the houses on it) was demolished for the development of the Belt Parkway that began under the imperial direction of Robert Moses in the early 1930s.
Growing up in a small New England town as I did, it was my father’s unrelenting chauvinistic obsession for New York that early on inculcated this kid with those Noo Yawk dreams that occasionally do come true. Although he moved away from the Big Town in his forty-first year, never to return, he nevertheless read the tabloids (the News and the Mirror) everyday (as did I when I was old enough to halfway comprehend what I was reading); and he talked about the town like he’d just come back from the corner deli.
A prolific RC although not in the halls of worship, he was the husband of two and the father of ten (this writer was the last one). He had an accent that is no longer heard in these parts. The last person I knew who spoke with that kind of Noo-Yawk accent was the late Robert Wagner, once Mayor of New York. Flat broad “a’s” and a touch of the brogue. Oil was “erl.” Avenue was “avenya.” A hand was a “paddy” (gimme yer paddy), a face was a “map” (lemme look at yer map). He called you “mac” if you were a kid. He swore all the time but never uttered the most common four-letter words that sprinkle conversation today. If he heard some of that coming out of this one’s mouth, he’d a probably said: “you say that one more time mac, and I’ll knock-yer-block-off." He thought he meant it at the time.
Yesterday was Wednesday and so it was Michael’s. I don’t know what it is about Wednesdays but it’s the day they can’t stay away. At Table Six at the beginning of the center of the room – Sally Quinn and Bed Bradlee and their son Quinn along with a lady friend, and Tom Brokaw. At the table in the bay, Evelyn Lauder, Mika Brzezinski, Alexandra Trower, and Myra Biblowit (who’s head of Evelyn’s Breast Cancer Research Foundation which is having it’s annual Hot Pink Party at the Waldorf on April 29th with a special musical performance by Elton John and Liza Minnelli).
Moving on through Michael’s: Stan Shuman with Neal Shapiro of PBS, Anne Colley and friends; Pat Mitchell, Cheri Kaufman; the Horsemen of the New Apocalypse (et al) Dr. Gerry Imber, Jeff Greenfield Jerry Della Femina, Andy Bergman, Michael Kramer; nearby: Terry McDonell and Marissa Miller; Jonathan Wald with Charlie Walk and Donnie Deutsch; Joan Gelman and CNN’s Robert Zimmerman with Diane Clehane; Fredi Friedman; Dr. Mitch Rosenthal with Ed Klein who’s about to publish his biography of Ted Kennedy; Peter Price, Lynn Goldberg, Steven Rubenstein, Donald Marron, Sarabeth Shrager, Richard Bressler; Myrna Blyth and Lisa Bloom.
Public Relations envoy Paul Wilmot was with famed dermatologist Dr. Nicholas Perricone who was sporting a fresh tan. “Vitamin D,” the doctor responded when I commented on his golden bronze. “Everyday,”he reiterated; “the best thing for you. Even better if you get some sun; the best Vitamin D of all.’
I was reminded of the Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory dinner for Dr. Jim Watson, the co-discoverer of the DNA, a few months ago. At the end of his speech about the wonders of science, he closed with: “and no matter what else you do, take some Vitamin D everyday.” Which reminded me of the City Harvest annual luncheon last year at the Metropolitan Club with Dr. Mehmet Oz as the honored guest. At the end of his acceptance speech he said: “And no matter what you take everyday, make sure to take some Vitamin D.”
Meanwhile, this past Tuesday I went down to the Harmonie Club for the Women’s Voices for Change luncheon featuring “A Midday Conversation on Midlife Reinvention with Arianna Huffington and Silda Wall Spitzer.”
Three or four years ago, I went to this organization’s initial fundraising gala at Cipriani 42nd Street. It was then called the National Menopause Foundation or something along those lines. Almost all of the several hundred guests were women, including some of the city’s most prominent, high profile women. They were all dressed to the nines, long dresses, the jewels, the whole ensemble. This was because their fearless leader Dr. Pat Allen who is one of the most popular OBGYN’s in New York, had advised everyone to Dress for the occasion. I wrote about it somewhere on these pages. They were celebrating taking the word “menopause” and its implications, public.
I think I was one of three or six men at the party. Although I was seated next to Dr. Allen and Diana Taylor. However, I got a lot of ribbing both there and afterwards. My mother and her sisters called it “change of life.” But that was then and this is now, as it was Tuesday at the Harmonie Club with several hundred women (and about four or eight men) present including many of the city’s most prominent (and industrious). “Change of Life” has come to mean joy and freedom.
Life in New York and the The Things You Learn.
Dr. Allen is a big honcho (honchette?) among these girls; a star. She elicits a kind of leader-of-the-pack respect.
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"The conversation about to begin: Lisa McCarthy, Cathy Graham, Silda Wall Spitzer, Gayfryd Steinberg, Arianna Huffington, Dr. Pat Allen (foreground) and Mary Hilliard. |
The program after lunch was Silda Wall Spitzer interviewing Arianna Huffington. I’m a big Silda fan, as some readers might surmise. I’ve followed the eclectic professional profile of Arianna for a long long time now. This was once a very smart and ambitious young woman in search of power in her community whatever that community might be. In the very beginning of her American life she came to this country (Greek-born and bred/Cambridge educated) and conquered the social heights of New York. She wrote books (not all well-received but all well publicized).
She married a rich Texan in a highly publicized and fancy ceremony given by her friend, Ann Getty, here in New York. She had two daughters with her husband who became a Congressman, taking them to Washington where she became ensconced in the media whirl with her own newspaper column. |
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Silda Wall Spitzer and Arianna Huffington ... |
Marriage ended, she moved back to California, from her marriage house in Santa Barbara back to Brentwood. She ran for governor, she wrote more and more, and finally she co-founded the web site, The Huffington Post, three or four years ago at which point, it would seem Arianna Huffington’s life all came together to form a solid core of interest, influence, and satisfaction.
The question and answer was interesting on two levels. It is very interesting as a man to sit in a room full of hundreds of women who are NOT including the presence of men in their conversation. For a man, this is highly unusual and he is well aware of his minority not only as a gender but also as a point of view. Although I am also reminded of the phrase many a mother (woman) has paradoxically said to her little son: “Act like a man.” |
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Silda is a natural diplomat’s personality, along with an advocate’s tact, with a slight soft Southerness to her accent. She’s trenchant, however, with her questions, which were designed to evoke the sharing of some wisdom from Arianna’s experience.
Silda asked Arianna how she felt about her success. Arianna replied that she didn’t think of it so much as a “success” but instead that it marked a time in her life where she felt she was where she should be. She clearly loves her work and as far as she’s concerned she can do this kind of thing for the rest of her life. She could do this forever; she found her place. She said she felt the two most important things in life for a woman (or a man) her age (58) was “getting enough sleep” and focusing on your passion. She told us a story about working herself into a position of being sleep deprived. She learned something from it. But she loves her work. |
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This is a woman who was well mothered; the first blessing. The mother was an independent woman who was “fearless” (the title of Arianna’s new book is On Becoming Fearless...In Love, Work, and Life). She taught her daughters that fear is there and fear is real but fear is something that can be moved through. Therein lies the fearless. Arianna now lives with her two daughters and her sister in Los Angeles. She meditates and practices yoga and makes a point of getting enough sleep.
Silda asked her about the business of “blogs” and of print media. Arianna said she loved newspapers and can’t imagine a world without them. She also felt there was a lot of room for the internet journalists, pointing out that two biggest events of this time are Iraq and The Financial Situation, both of which, she pointed out, have not been adequately covered or even at times truthfully covered by our mainstream media. She asks why that is.
I was left thinking that it might be because the readership doesn’t really want to know. We’re like that. At times. |
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