Carolyne Roehm

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Carolyne Roehm is one of those people who, whatever their origins, has been born a thoroughbred filled with nervous energy and tensed for a demanding race that they set up for themselves. Unsurprisingly, she is tall, lean and elegant. There is a taut quality to her poise, and even her diction, which, despite certain unguarded moments, is very careful. But all of this is tempered by honesty, a sense that she is also quite vulnerable and cares greatly what others think. She is clearly a tremendously hard worker, having had a career in fashion design followed by a string of books on flowers and stylish living. Interestingly, despite her famous marriage to Henry Kravis and the whole Bonfire of the Vanities circus of that time, she now sees herself, probably truthfully, as something of a loner.

You were once Oscar de la Renta’s assistant. Was that the realization of a dream?

Oh yeah. I actually had another offer [from Jerry Silverman] and it really wasn’t what I wanted to do. He said to me ‘well, what do you want to do?’ I said I want to work for Oscar de la Renta. I really love ruffles and evening clothes and girly-girly stuff … I digress but I remember once I had to do the prints for the umbrellas [that were to be licensed] … I mean you did everything. And Oscar makes an umbrella and says ‘Let’s put a little ruffle around the edge of it.’ Then this guy [involved in the licensing] says to me ‘This guy puts fucking ruffles on everything!’

You were young and relatively new to New York but you seemed to definitely have a plan, and ambition.

At the time I was earning about $13,000 a year and I went to work for Oscar for $9,000 … I think it was $126 a week! I had a rich boyfriend (he was a good boyfriend — from Lichtenstein!) and he bought me this Saint Laurent skirt, the cashmere sweater and brown suede boots … and that’s how I went for my interview with Oscar. He said to me, ‘You’ll make more money [elsewhere] and I’ve never had a female assistant, but call me on Monday.’ Little did I know that when he said that (and I know this now after working for him for more than ten years) it was how you got rid of people. He was always in the country at the weekend and only came back around lunchtime on Monday. [eventually] I became sort of the daughter.

L. to r.: Looking into the living room from the front entry hall; An imposing 18th century sculpture of Madame de Pompadour as Diana the Huntress stands guard.
A view of the living room. An 18th century Italian armchair covered in gold silk damask stands in the foreground. On the rear wall hangs an 1860 portrait of a French aristocrat by Franz Xavier Winterhalter.
Reflections from a bulls-eye mirror.
L. to r.: Oversized bookcases surrounded by classical pilasters hold a massive collection of leather bound volumes; A French 19th century Sebastian Erard piano stands beneath a portrait by Franz Xaver Winterhalter in the corner of the living room.

What about his wife at the time [Françoise de Langlade, Editor-in-Chief of French Vogue]?

I was scared to death of her. She was an amazing woman, very strong. I think I learned more about lifestyle, certainly through Oscar, but she, she did it in a way that Americans didn’t do it. No one used scented candles or scent in a room at that time – you have to remember this was the 70s. No one had the beautiful linens that they used on a daily basis. But being very French, she was very direct and I was the kid. She had a tremendous impact on my very provincial, mid-Western …you know …I remember traveling with them once, when he launched his perfume and this was 1976 and I was seated behind them in first class (I guess the perfume company was paying), and they were sitting there planning who was going to be coming to this event …it was the first time I ever saw a couple as a real team.

Did you leave when you got married to Mr Roehm?

Yes I did. And within the first month I realized I had married a lunatic. I left the Lichtensteiner for the German. He asked me to marry him on our second date. I remember Françoise calling me on the phone and saying ‘You are making a terrible mistake marrying this German. It will never work.’

The double-height coffered ceilings give the living room a sense of height and scale. Above the marble fireplace hangs a French, 19th century gessoed mirror.
The custom sofas and pillows are covered in Scalamandre fabric. A globe shaped sewing table is Viennese Biedermeier.
Looking toward the balcony from the living room. Ionic pilasters and rich moldings provide a sense of order to the grand proportions of the room.

So you came back after 13 miserable months in Germany and then you were single for a while before you met a nice Jewish guy. [Financier, Henry Kravis, from whom she is now divorced.]

Yeah. We were at that lunch place … what was it called … you know at that time there was just that one place everybody went. Well I was with a friend who introduced me to Kirk Douglas. He said ‘She just came back. She was married to a German.’ And Kirk Douglas turns around and says, ‘You need to marry a nice Jewish boy.’

Was he going to supply one?

So, I meet Henry at a party, while I’m still working for Oscar. You have to remember at that point he hadn’t made … you know … the money. KKR was just a couple of years old.

And was it at that time you launched your own design business?

I thought maybe it’s the time – before I become the world’s oldest assistant – (you know, ten years!) … so I spoke to someone at Saks who’d I gotten to know and said, ‘Do you think I can do this on my own?’ and they said, ‘Yeah’.

A pitcher and vases from Carolyne’s Neo Classical collection hold vibrant yellow and orange roses.
A recessed ceiling dome sheds light on the round dining room. The chairs are 19th century Russian.
Swedish candlesticks surround a 19th century Italian marble column. A round gilt mirror blocks out an undesirable window.
The wood-paneled library with a painting by Pieter Gerardus van Os hanging above the fireplace.
Another view of the library. Tiger fabric on the pillows and side chair are from Clarence House.
A view from the library to the second floor balcony.

When that business closed (following a family tragedy), how did you cope?

I was getting ready to move my business to the next level … the contracts were drawn and everything, and that was June and my stepson was killed in July. He was 19. It’s the nightmare of all nightmares. I remember it so clearly. I was up at Weatherstone [the country house] … Do you remember Hurricane Sam? There was a hurricane that came through in the August and it was also when the coup in Russia came, it was 1992. And I remember watching it on TV and I said, ‘I don’t know what’s going on in the world. We’ve gone through this horrible tragedy. There was this huge hurricane coming in and there’s a coup in Russia and I’ve got to back and design a resort collection.’ And I remember picking up a review of Chanel; and it was a mean review. And I said, ‘This is such total bullshit. I don’t know that I can spend my life this way.’ But it [closing the business] was a mistake.

So why do you think it was a mistake?

Because I think you shouldn’t make life-changing, life-shattering decisions when you are very depressed and when you are going through a tragedy.

L. to r.: A flamed mahogany Russian chair sits in the front hall.; Beloved Floozie.
L. to r.: A view uptown from the living room windows; Carolyne discovered this French 19th century chandelier at the Marché aux Puces.
A set of prints taken from 19th century book line the upstairs bedroom hall.

Do you still feel that way?

Er, no, not now. But at the time I was a career woman. People always think ‘Why in the world would you work? You’re married to one of the richest men.’ I thought ‘I have worked all my life and they think that I’m in this business because I married a rich man.’ All those years of work, all of that meant nothing. When I made the decision to shut down the company it was like another death for me. But I was finished. I was on the verge of a breakdown.

You strike me as very conscientious. I bet you were a good student.

I was a good student. I was not a rebel. I was a goody-goody.

A flat screen television is cleverly camouflaged behind curtained glass doors in the master bedroom.
Carolyne was so fond of this Cowtan & Tout floral that she wrapped the master bed and walls in it. The Austrian commodes on either side of the bed are from the Thurn and Taxis estate.
A Louis XVI bench by Jacob fils sits in front of the master bed.
Another view of the master bedroom. The headboard is a reinterpretation of a 19th century bed.

Has that changed over time?

Er … how have I rebelled? I think that everyone anticipated that I would re-marry and marry the same type … and … I think you know, I’m a loner. In the 80s and 90s, I just didn’t have any fun. I was like the hamster in the cage. Trying to do the philanthropy, trying to do the career, trying to run seven houses … it was nuts.

You just got back from Aspen where your current partner, Simon, lives. Does he live there full time?


Oh, well you’ll probably stay in the relationship for a while.

[laughs] Well, I’ve been in it for three and a half years! [to the maid ‘Oh we need ice you know, Rosa? Ice tea … that’s the operative word for ice and everybody wants ice. You wanted ice in your drink, right?] You know at this point in my life, I have such a busy life and I have a wonderful life, although sometimes a little frantic life, er … since I don’t have children and he doesn’t have children, so we don’t have any of the complications of that, and you know … I can get on a plane, I don’t take any luggage. He is a devotee of jetBlue, so in two seconds, we can just meet up. It gives me my independence and my own life … and he … well he is sweeter about it. He says ‘I miss you, I miss you.’

Fresh white carnations on the bedside commode.
A Danish mirror and French sconces, all 18th century, hang above the marble fireplace. The 19th century Austrian table is from the Thurn and Taxis estate.
L. to r.: A Northern European, painted 19th century chest of drawers stands against a master bedroom wall; When she is at her country house, Weatherstone, in Connecticut, Carolyne is a keen gardener. Her city apartment is filled with fresh plants and flowers.
Family photos.
Personal photos of family and friends atop the skirted, glass-topped dressing table. A tied curtain helps with ventilation when the air conditioning is down.
The master bath needed little updating from its former state.

What do you like about New York?

New York gave me a tremendous a life … if I hadn’t come here …like everyone else …you know, I went to see a fabulous play last night, I got to go in for two seconds to American Kennels this morning and see puppies and then I love the fact you can go out to a greengrocer and buy flowers.

You buy flowers from the corner store?

Sure. My favorite store in New York is Dean and DeLuca.

A second bedroom also serves as study and a dressing room with a wall of additional closet space.
More roses from the country garden.
A converted maid’s room is now a home office.
Open shelving for Carolyne’s collection of handbags.
Photos of Carolyne from a magazine shoot.

So you don’t necessarily need to spend a lot of money to get your kicks. I bought the skirt I am wearing from Zara for $17.99 – would you ever buy something like that?

Is that a Zara skirt? I think you look fabulous! I’m a big JCrew lover. And this is a $298 dress from a little place in Paris … the shoes cost more than the dress.

Why do women love clothes so much? Even if a woman says she’s not interested in fashion, I never quite believe them.

I don’t either. It gives us the opportunity to be a lot of different people and that’s why I love fashion.

A 19th century reproduction of an ancient battle scene.
Looking down the limestone stairwell.
From the kitchen to the living room. Set out for guests this ‘Lacque de Chine’ Haviland Limoges porcelain tea set is from Carolyne’s new home collection.

You were born Jane Carolyne Smith and came from what people like to call an ‘ordinary’ background, growing up in Kirkville, Missouri. What does your mom think of your career and the life you created?

Oh part of her is very proud and part of her thinks it’s really ridiculous. She says ‘Why don’t you just relax?’

Why don’t you?

Because it’s interesting to do things.

You love your dogs and have pictures of them dogs everywhere. Are there any cats?

Louis [my cat] died. He was 13 and I decided that I was going to get another cat, actually I decided to get a cat for my mother. I thought it would be nice for my mom. But my mom said ‘I’m not taking that cat. I want to be able to travel.’ And I said ‘that’s so mean!’ But I should have called that cat Israel because [it’s surrounded by] all those dogs, just like Syria, Lebanon, Iraq, Iran … like the Arab states waiting for the demise of Israel! His name is actually Nicky, and we kept his claws.

More flowers from the garden atop a 19th century Russian desk from Ariane Dandois.
A reproduction chair from the Oscar de la Renta furniture line.

Do you like to eat? What did you have for breakfast?

You don’t want to know what my breakfast was!

I do!

Donuts. I always have glazed donuts with the maple icing.

How many?

Only one … today. In Aspen I was going to turn over a new leaf and start eating a healthy breakfast but there’s a place called Paradise Bakery … I get the sugar cookies and the snipper doodles … I have a new thing: you put them in the freezer.

What do you like to read?

Trash … but anyway. I mean people who say they don’t [read trash] … well good for them … aren’t they hoity-toity. I’m right in the middle of a Patterson. I love murder, whodunit and espionage. I’ve read every Agatha Christie and there’s 81 of them.

As you say yourself, you have a wonderful life but I suppose someone could look at all you have and perhaps think you’ve skipped the bad bits.

Oh honey … you don’t even know the half of it … [laughs].

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