The Ice Queen Cometh

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The thaw. Photo: JH.

Friday, March 5, 2021. It was Sunny and cold, yesterday in New York. Unremarkable for this time of the year. By nighttime it dropped to the low 20s with the Real Feel of 3 degrees. It was the wind that dropped it. But: according to the same forecasts, Next Week we’re gonna see temps up to the 60s. You have no idea how exciting that is for a New York at this time of the year and in the situation we’ve been living for a year. And, at the end of that week we turn the clocks ahead.

Yippee, it’s the “little things” that give us some hope and sunshine. Although I have an old friend who hates it and wishes they’d drop it. I’ve asked her several times and because she is a very intelligent and sensible person, I asked her “why?” She just “hates” it.


Clearing the path in front of the Met.

Now the other topic I’ve been fascinated by in this alarming world we’re living is Meghan and Harry. I know several women — all very intelligent and worldly — who “hate” Meghan and think Harry’s a big baby, weak or “effed-up.”

I don’t know either of the principals although another woman friend of mine told me she met Harry once — here in New York —  in the elevator of an apartment building. And … he was very nice and neighborly and warm. Just like the impression you can get from his photos. 

Princess Diana with Princes William and Harry. Photograph by Jayne Fincher / HBO

In his heyday as the second son of Princess Di, touring the world for his country, he was not only a hit but a smash. Everyone loved him. And very good for jolly olde UK.  Other than his late beloved mother, he had ascended as the family star, an international ambassador of goodness and kindness. A great way to make friends with the neighbors of the world for his country.

Who knows what was in it for him – in his private thoughts, the ones you rarely tell anybody. It’s none of our business anyway. Harry has the natural ability to be one of us. He comes from a strange family that live in a kind of giant Georgian movie constantly being updated and photographed. What it is like when staff and photographers have left the room, is largely unknown and possibly profoundly ordinary and full of the same issues and distractions you find in any family.

Monarchies are an ancient habit on its very last legs in our history, although who knows. Maybe they’ll come back in style one day in the distant future. Although the Matron, Her Majesty the Queen, Elizabeth II, is possibly the most Powerful Woman in the world simply because of how deftly she has played her ancient role in the UK. And because she has naturally intelligently handled her role like a real Queen — like no one else! That’s ultimate power among us humans, and there is not one among us billions who could play it better.

However, Elizabeth II came into her life role just as the next generation was born — the Post-War generation — and the whole world changed dramatically and continues to change dramatically. That’s the experience of her off-spring and moreso even of their off-spring. 

And now we have this attractive young woman, an actress working on her career out in Hollywood, who meets this “second son” (the “spare”) and he’s obviously a nice guy and naturally friendly and he’s a Prince — and grandson of the Queen and son of the beloved and tragic Diana — who had a horrible time in, or adjusting to that family! 

The modern day Samson and Delilah.

And he’s attracted to this beautiful and presumably friendly actress. A coup de foudre!! We’ll never know what went on in his head. If you’ve ever had the experience of meeting somebody who just knocked you out on meeting, it’s big. Yes, there’s the sexual attraction, but it’s the inner wow vibe that keeps the memory. He obviously liked her. You can’t blame him for that. Or the fact that maybe she turned on the allure for him. That’s not a new number for the girls in our good old world.

I obviously don’t know what her impression was, and I’ve never been interested enough to read any of the tabloid stories. Although as it developed and they moved to Hollywood I could see that it could make a good movie, or better yet a whole TV series (the characters, that is).

And then they married and lived happily ever after for the first few months (like a lotta people we all know), and then they had this huge internationally tabloidal family separation/divorce from Big Mama and her Little Ones. This is all very excellent PR for good ole Buckingham Palace because it highlights once again, an innocent, seemingly normal marriage where a battle develops between the in-laws and the couple. It’s harmless for the audience and strengthens the Establishment as it continues to change.

All of the women I know have been watching this now melodrama unfold. Even our friend and columnist Blair Sabol has had a few things to say that gotta a lotta applause from her readers. I asked her about writing any more about it, and she said the upcoming interview with Oprah should be the last word.

Although with Donald Trump  having left the White House, and banned from Twitters and Facebook, be great to get the three of them Harry, Meghan and the Donald just for a celeb shot. That alone could keep the talkers talking.

What confounds me is, what’s the big deal? We don’t know the real story of their life from the palace grounds to their exit to good old Hollywood; anymore than people  know the real story of anyone’s marriage relationship. That takes two and remains so privately, and often forever so.


A scene from Sunday’s Oprah with Meghan & Harry primetime special.

Maybe it’s a 21st century Samson and Delilah. She  looks like she could be the boss and he looks like he could be the slave. A lot of marriages look like that because you women are the real smart and clever ones when it comes us boys, all boys.

Many of us often know what it’s like to be number 2, or second, or the little brother.  It can be a big challenge in a young man’s life. Harry’s clearly been living that life until he met his Duchess. Whether he made a mistake or not is for him and him alone to judge. Just as it is for all of us millions of current “detractors.”

Besides it’s usually the woman who gets blamed when marriage issues arise in the public eye. It’s kind of an insult to the guy, implying that he’s weak, or stupid. Or bad news. And maybe it’s true. And maybe it’s not.

Whatever it is, it’s something else other than how are you dealing with this life in pandemia. Thank God for that, having been living in a social desert for the last 12 months! the stories I hear — not read — are difficult and confusing and depressing and isolating. Meghan and Harry have become The Neighbors who never wear their masks! Arf! Arf!

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